So What It's Like Being Skinny?

There's this generally accepted idea that skinny equals privileged and few people get to speak the truth about it. Also, there's the much worse part about this - when people feel entitled to bring thin people down, because "they're already privileged and have it better than the rest."Let's have a realistic, most honest look about what it really means to be skinny and see what such people put up with from their oh-so-loving and so kind fat buddies.

They always make ridiculous assumptions

People won't think you were born like that. They'll just quickly assume that you're either this or that and it's always going to be something negative and shameful.They'll never take into account a fast metabolism, the thyroid, stress, depression and anxiety, nor disease. They'll assume you're skinny on purpose.


You're a slave

Yes, if you're that thin you must be a slave to this social construct of the ideal body image, you're torturing yourself in order to look like society wants you to.

You're doing it for the men

Obviously, you want to please men and be like those cover models, whom are all photoshopped anyway. You're starving yourself for others.

Of course you're starving yourself

I mean, how could you achieve that? Everything is fattening, even water and air, too. So how can you be that skinny? Poor creature, you're refusing a life of joy to look like that and do the society's game...

You're on heroin

Yes, we've heard that too. Us, skinny people, must be drug addicts, because how else could one look like this?

Do you even eat?

They have a hard time believing you've actually discovered the existence of food.

It's easy for you to climb the social ladder

Actually it isn't. when skinny is paired with beautiful, guess what. Women will be jealous of you and shut all open doors in front of you. Men will want to take advantage of you and will only see you as a piece of meat and will also shut all the doors for you if you refuse them. It is exceedingly difficult for a pretty, skinny woman of integrity to have a blooming career, unless it's a career that actually calls for such looks.

Because everyone sees you as privileged, the opposite happens: they leave you behind, they push you away, they take advantage of you, they hamper your progress.

This is the reality out there and skinny is rarely privileged. There is always harsh judgement and many lies being told about you. There's always a wrong assumption. Some people show appreciation, while others do anything they can to get you down, to stain your reputation, to make themselves appear as genuine and better human beings.

The #Fatkini Trend: Things Confident People Don't Do

The same old story - large women feeling put down, not really doing anything about it (and this may range from making healthier choices to working on their own psychological acceptance issues) and deciding to go on a parade. What happens is that they attract the comments and attitudes to naturally follow such behaviour.

This post is meant to paint a picture of what really happens there. I am in no way put off by the fatkini photos, but by the attitudes behind this form of activism. I think beauty comes in many shapes and sizes. I am aware that some are bothered by such posts. I've tried to be as nice as possible to people with extreme weight, but they can't seem to accept any other view but theirs. They could never accept the fact that skinny people are being bullied equally. They usually say "OK, I know you get your share of rude behaviour, BUT...". There is always a 'BUT'. The fat ones always pose as the more victimised, the more abused, the more hated and unaccepted. Endless victimising and we all know what that is - it comes from a lack of self acceptance and no will to take charge and do something for yourself.

Sadly, this is mistaken for... confidence.


1. Confident people don't parade.

When you are truly confident, there is no need to expose yourself like that. You are what you are and you go about your business happily, not needing to prove anyone anything. When you are confident, you are not put down by a bully's opinion. You don't feel the need to post pictures of your own body in order to feel accepted. If you are mentally sound and healthy, you don't need to do that to have self-acceptance. Also, you don't have to get anyone's acceptance.


2. Confident people look at themselves only.

Compare yourself only to what you really want to be. You like yourself fat? Fine, but be aware that there are very real health risks involved. Want to slim down? Get a good physician's advice and start doing something about that. Don't hunt for those skinny people and tell them how they should eat a sandwich or more. Don't spit at the 'evil media' for not preferring you. Look inwards at your own acceptance issues. Needing to make condescending comments on people who look differently that you do shows nothing but self-hatred and low self esteem.


3. Confident people understand how standards are being formed.

Being thin is the norm? You think it's the media that made it so? Think again.
Tomorrow, the media may want to promote a different ideal. What if this one would mean having 4-inches long nails and a dozen nose piercings? That surely wouldn't gain much popularity. Would people conform? NO. In order to become the norm, a standard needs popular SUPPORT. In other terms, people like skinny, that's why it's popular. It would have never been the norm without the support it's been getting. This is a fact and nothing can change it.


4. Confident people understand and accept that overweight or obese isn't healthy.

You may be feeling well now, but soon those ugly health troubles will creep up on you. This is a proven, highly visible scientific fact. Too much fat leads to illness and to premature death. The other big issue is that the fat activist are starting to spread false science, claiming that thin individuals are prone to the same conditions. FALSE! Unless one looks like a poor starving African or they make huge dieting mistakes, there is no need to worry. Being thin in itself, even very skinny, is no problem at all.

5. Confident people know the facts.

OK, some of these facts were already mentioned. In general, we mean that smart, accepting, confident people who are fine about their looks know what the truth is. They don't buy the fat activists' lies. They know, for example, that the healthiest and longest-living people in the world are rather skinny. Take a look at the Japanese and the monks everywhere. Of course, there are skinny people in Africa and Asia, but that is because of poverty. There's not much poverty in Japan though, is it? In any case, social groups like the monks are very thin, yet they live long and healthy lives. Again, a fact you cannot change.

6. Confident people don't need to put down anyone.

This one speaks for itself.

7. Confident people don't see others as privileged.

Since thin is the norm, many large people somehow believe that it's OK to pick on thin girls (it's mostly about the girls), because anyway they're put on a pedestal. "They are already accepted, so they won't suffer like we do!" I smell DOUBLE STANDARDS here! If you want to be admired and accepted, don't act to others in the opposite way. If you think the others have too much cake, don't try to get some of it on your plate. Go and make your own cake and enjoy it.

Therefore, if you are large/fat/overweight and reading this, do yourself good and stop blaming others. Stop blaming them either for your weight or for your lack of acceptance. Go ahead and post bikini pictures, there's nothing wrong with it. Just don't do it out of desperation, out of a desire to be accepted by others. Society will never be like we want it to be. You're not saying anything positive about yourself when you are doing that.

Skinny Shaming - Do You Do It? Shame on You!

Are you aware that Marylin Monroe was "skinny" for her time? That the absolute symbol of elegance and femininity, Audrey Hepburn, was actually underweight? Do you realise that by putting down people with a different figure you only point to your own bodily and image issues?


I came across a post explaining how women called "whales" are actually happy, loved and enjoy all the good things in life. OK, I get it that it's insulting to call a fat woman a whale, but isn't it a bit too far-stretched to say that your fat is the product of wisdom and knowledge? Come on... That's fairy-tales for kids you're telling there, you know it. Also, the same post claimed that "mermaids don't exist, and if they did, they would have no sex life, would not enjoy dinner with a husband or fun times with friends". Oh, dear! How hate-driven you have to be to invent such things? To completely shut your eyes and say that those skinny women don't exist...

Why in the world would skinny women not be able to do all those thing? There are naturally skinny people there - me being one of them - and trust me, they stuff themselves with all the goodies possible, they have sex and nothing stops them from having dinner with anyone they want! So what is the problem exactly?

You hate thin women so much that you close your eyes and pretend they don't even exist? Get over yourself and accept, truly embrace the way you are... So far, you are only pretending to accept yourself. You're not happy with your life when you are posting such things online, I can really tell the hate and shame underneath it all.


You hate the beauty industry and the standards it promotes?
Think about it... Would people accept standards that don't resonate with them? It's all very simple: people like what they see and they want it. They are not forced into accepting that standard.

Are you aware of the weight loss industry? Do you know how huge it is? It's because people want to lose weight. If people didn't want this, that industry would simply fail at some point. Instead, it is THRIVING! What does that tell you?

Is there a weight gain industry out there? Try looking for fattening supplements or solutions. They are hard to come by.

See? I'm talking about facts here. No need to insult or to shame you. Just facts and realities you can easily observe on your own. No hate. I just hate your way of telling skinny people they are "wrong" or claiming they don't even exist or that they are the absolute most miserable beings on earth.

Miranda Kerr - Victoria's Secret supermodel: skinny and adored. She is married to Orlando Bloom and they have kids together. No sex life, no happiness and no husband, you say?

She's making loads of money on that, darlings!

Skinny women can eat whatever they want and as much as they want. There are countless medical reasons why one never stores fat. You already hate them for this, don't you.

Skinny women can model for any famous brand and don't need to diet.

Skinny women are never worried about calories when they're invited over for dinner. They don't count calories when they cook, when they shop for food or when they reach for a snack.

Skinny women don't feel jealousy when they see models or cover girls (ok, I admit I am jealous when they have better hair than mine).

As for men... they prefer whatever they prefer, and that ranges from obese to skinny. Try ask a thin woman how many dates she gets, there's a lot more than you believe. Now stop closing your eyes saying that such women don't exist! I'm real. They're real. 

Also, in your desperate efforts, you could be doing real harm to people who just don't deserve it. Some people may be too poor to afford adequate nutrition. Some have been dealing with too much stress to keep the weight you want them to have. Some people have food allergies - do you know how hard it is to live with that? Some people have awful diseases that keep them thin. Some people are actually thin because they are constantly told they are! The mind picks up on it and it shapes the body as told!

MARYLIN MONROE.  Skinny-haters nowadays promote Marylin's image in an attempt to show that fatter (or 'curvy', as they feel better calling it) is superior to today's standard. However, they ignore that the way MM looked back in the day was actually SKINNY for those times. So, this means that in those times there were actually loads of women who would loathe MM and call her a skinny ugly bitch, eh!


"Real women aren't skinny"
So if she's got a fast metabolism that is simply genetic, she should be taken out of the 'women' category? Or should she be ruled out just because she isn't like you?

Breaking news: skinny women have vagina, have breasts and even have curves that you don't notice or that their clothing may not show. It's all about the hip-waist-shoulder ratio and about proportions. Her thighs will still be wider than her calves, for example. And if some men lust for fatter women, it doesn't mean that you have to ignore all those who actually drool for magazine models.

I came across another desperate attempt of fat women: a post telling how "real men choose curvy women". Luckily, there was a post in response to it: "Real men choose whatever they prefer!". Now that's a truth! So you're not only trying to shame thin ladies, but also the men who prefer them... How insecure and hateful of you!

Sorry my darlings, but no matter how hard you try to make thin women 'understand' that men don't want them, they're still dealing with all those suitors lining up at their door. Ask any skinny girl who takes care of herself and who's pretty enough.

Let me put it like this:

If you don't like it when you are called fat and society wants to reduce you all to one size, then why do you want to bring others to your size? Isn't it just as evil?


You haven't accepted your "curvy body", you have only replaced your shame with skinny shaming!


The oppressed become the oppressors. Low and weak....

Also, why do you pick on thin women but not on thin men? I bet your only concern are women - when it comes to weight. Are you somehow afraid they're better than you? Is it the fear of competition?


Here's some further reading for the matter at hand:

http://birdeemag.com/skinny-shaming/

"a bullying tactic: if I put her down for being skinny/thin/athletic, I will feel better about myself."

http://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/the-womens-blog-with-jane-martinson/2013/aug/05/skinny-shaming-fat-size-appearance

"I write about this in my new book, The Ministry of Thin, and I've been shocked at the backlash. The plus-size sisterhood can be frightening. Among the messages I received (only from women, and mostly anonymous) I was called a skinny bitch, a body fascist, and a fat-nazi. I was informed that men "love something to grab on to", and that "curves" are sexier than skeletons. And yet my book contains not a single word of criticism about larger-sized people"

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/dana-oliver/skinny-shaming_b_3506313.html

"Before you even think about prejudging a woman (no matter her size), think really hard about what it says about you."


Before you get to full-blown rage against me, please note that I haven't shamed anyone fat in this post. I only attacked some for their low self esteem and for their hate and intolerance. I used no bad words about being fat per se.